March 9, 2006: Thursday - Talking to a Breast Cancer Survivor

I talked today with my neighbor, Jerry, a breast cancer survivor,. HE had cancer two and a half years ago. He had a mastectomy on one side and a year later, had an elective mastectomy on the other side. He had chemotherapy first and then radiation. The chemotherapy was bad; the radiation was OK. He's now on tamoxifen. No side effects except he has trouble losing weight.

The other is a cousin I’ll call Donna. She lives in a small town about 4 hours from us. Donna is 62. She had a mammogram and a lump was found. She followed her doctor's advice without question. He advised her that because she was small-breasted to begin with, it was better to have a mastectomy instead of a lumpectomy. He said that by the time the lump was removed, she'd not have much breast left anyway. Donna also did not want radiation - no way, no how! (She said.) Having a mastectomy takes care of that. There's nothing to radiate after the breast is gone so ... no radiation. She didn't have to have chemotherapy because the cancer wasn't in the lymph nodes. She is now on tamoxifen for 5 years. That was about two weeks ago. She's feeling good and going back to work soon.

I listened and asked questions but did not make any comments. I was seething inside. Her cancer was not much bigger than mine (Stage 1 - no chemotherapy. Her tumor is 1.7 cm.; mine is 1.3 cm.). She’s also a bigger person that I am. I couldn’t believe that her doctor advised taking the whole breast! It all happened so fast: one week from the time of the lump's discovery to the mastectomy. All I could think was, Butcher!

I received get-well cards from two friends today. The 'angel' who called me today was my brother, Chuck. We had a very nice chat. It was so sweet of him to call.

Also, my friend Karen came over and gave me a quick lesson on how to do yoga. (At least one research scientist believes poorly oxygenated cells are a contributing cause of cancer.) So, I’ll give it a try…. Karen was sweet. She said that she'd tried to put herself in my shoes and the 'what-ifs' were overwhelming. Her voice caught when she said that. I knew then that she did really understand at least in part. Few there are that can genuinely empathize. She is one.